WASHINGTON — Lamenting that even the purest hearts were fated to be broken, the confused and anguished U.S. populace was struggling Friday with the question of why bad things happen to good people following the news that Vanessa Trump filed for divorce from Donald Trump Jr. earlier this week.
“How could this happen to our Don, sweet Don Jr., of all people? He’s kind, thoughtful, warm, caring, and compassionate—He doesn’t deserve this,” said the visibly distressed nation, wiping away hot tears brought on by contemplating the fundamental injustice of a world in which ill fortune befalls those who love so completely and selflessly.
“This is such a blow to that whole generous, caring family, those angels dwelling among us, those who gave themselves to us all and asked for nothing in return. The searing pain of heartbreak must be a thousand times worse for hearts as pure as Don’s and Vanessa’s. If only we could take their agonies upon ourselves and spare the Trumps this soul-deep anguish!”
As of press time, the saddened American populace had let the couple know they were there for them if needed, just as Don Jr. and Vanessa had always been for them.
Source: The Onion
]]>(VATICAN ENQUIRER) Just hours after the announcement of the Brangelina (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie) break up, many Nostradamus experts say the famous soothsayer had predicted the event in one of his quatrains.
Famous for foretelling many historical events such as the death of King Henry II of France, the advent Napoleon or the two World Wars, Michel de Nostradame, known as Nostradamus, would also have predicted the end of “Brangelina.”
According to some experts, an extract from the fourth book of prophecies would clear reference to the separation of the most famous Hollywood couple. American historian John Hogue, the excerpt is one of the clearest and most explicit predictions of the work of Nostradamus.
Hogue says the prediction is consistent with the overall work of the prophet, which specialized in predicting disasters of planetary scale.
After twelve years together, Angelina Jolie filed for divorce from her husband Brad Pitt, accusing him of adultery and of alcohol and cannabis abuse.
The 41-year old American actress and director filed for custody of their children, saying she was worried about the impact of Pitt’s drug use and tantrums on them.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are among the most famous actors in Hollywood, and their combined wealth is estimated at nearly US$400 million.
Adapted from Worldnewsdailyreport.com