Disclaimer: The following article is purely fictional, a satire/parody, made up, a complete fabrication, not even remotely close to being the truth, purely the work of a twisted and demented mind, not to be believed…like everything on this website!

In a back alley meeting between low level ranking government officials, Costa Rica has given Nicaraguan concession rights over Guanacaste in a histerical deal. The deal was brokered by the desperate  CEO of CINE POLO.

The Q was able to confirm that the meeting literally took place in the back alley of downtown San José hotel – the name of the hotel is being withheld to protect the guilty.

The Q learned that it was clear that the Costa Rican officials would not give in to the threats of Daniel Ortega, the president of Nicaragua and his claim for the prosperous Costa Rica province of Nicaragua. However, the Tico maes proposed the the idea of a concession to their counterparts, who were said to reply, “pues!”.

According to the totally non-reliable source, the CEO that has been filling the airwaves with his desperate attempts to revive his fledgling movie theatre chain against competition, an agreement was reach after parties saw the “win-win” of the situation: Nicaragua would get its beloved Guanacaste back (as it would be understand by the people as its government will explain it to them) and Costa Rica would get a residual (concession fee) payment without having to give up territory.

Looking at some of the positive points, many Costa Ricans would now be able to fulfill the desire of “international travel” and Nicaraguans in Costa Rica would not have to go too far to visit their homeland.

With this deal the leaders of both countries can save face. Daniel Ortega, president of Nicaragua, can how tell his people he finally got Guanacaste back stolen from them by the Ticos, while Laura Chinchilla, president of Costa Rica, can stay true to her word that Guanacaste will always be part of Costa Rica.

The deal now needs the approval of higher ups and a meeting of the two leaders.

But, as in all negotiations, there is a snag.

The Nicas want the Parque La Merced or “Nica park” in the heart of downtown San José. The objective here is for Nicaragua to develop a Nica cultural centre, that will include the sale of tourist packages to the Nicaraguan concession departamento (province) of Guanacaste.

This couple, it seems, was looking to buy the same great tasting bananas they got at home up north above the 44th parallel.

For some reasons the bananas at their local supermarkets looked different than the ones right in front of them. They felt different. Their colour was different. They probably even tasted different.

I couldn’t resist.

“The bananas you get at home probably come from Costa Rica. Did you know that Costa Rica is a major exporter of bananas?”, I told the foreigner couple.

But how could that be? Surely the bananas would be over ripened by the time they get to their local supermarket, so that could not be the case. And why would Canada need to import bananas from Costa Rica – or anywhere else – surely they grow them. No?

Although they did not speak the words I could see that had to be their thought through the look in their eyes.

So, the wife had the great idea, talk to the manager. In her broken Spanish, she tells the produce manager, Juan José, “pourquoi no haber bananas importadas?” (Why you no have imported bananas)

The manager looked puzzled. He surely thought Costa Rica is an exporter of the best bananas why would these gringos want us to import them?

But, his answer was typical Tico. “I am sorry, you are correct, I will speak to general manager and next week will have them”.

I can’t wait. I think I am going to stake out the supermarket, on the look out for the couple, who will surely be looking for the imported bananas.

And can’t wait to see the look on their faces, for the supermarket did in fact comply with the customers request.

Yes sir, they put up a big sign in the banana section which reads, “Imported From Costa Rica!“