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FIFA – Vatican Enquirer http://vaticanenquirer.com A satirical commentary on the news. Thu, 09 Mar 2017 15:16:20 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=5.7.11 http://vaticanenquirer.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/cropped-vaticanenquirer-fav-65x65.png FIFA – Vatican Enquirer http://vaticanenquirer.com 32 32 71485691 U.S. Anxiously Awaiting The Arrival of Eduardo Li http://vaticanenquirer.com/u-s-anxiously-awaiting-the-arrival-of-eduardo-li/ http://vaticanenquirer.com/u-s-anxiously-awaiting-the-arrival-of-eduardo-li/#respond Sat, 30 May 2015 11:27:26 +0000 http://vaticanenquirer.com/?p=1450 Photoshopped image of Li in the MDC cell block, where he will be held until trial. Image by Andres Badilla, DiarioExtra.com
Photoshopped image of Li in the cell block of the MDC Brooklyn, where he will be held until trial. Image by Andres Badilla, DiarioExtra.com

 

BROOKLYN, NY (The Vatican Enquirer) – U.S. authorities are anxiously waiting the arrival of Costa Rican Eudaro Li in Brooklyn, New York, to have their day in a preliminary hearing.

In fact, it has already defined where the Tico will touch g ground.

According to New York prosecutor, Darren LaVerne, upon his arrival Li will be transferred to the Metropolitan Detention Center (MDC) Brooklyn.

The MDC Brooklyn is located in front of the Upper Bay, which divides New York and New Jersey, resting place of the famous Statue of Liberty, an icon of America.

New Jersey has one of the largest Costa Rican population in the United States, with Trenton, Bound Brook and Elizabeth very close to MDC, allowing Li to order in typical Costa Rican food and get visits from other Costa Ricans.

The plan, according to LaVerne, is for the Costa Rican to spend a couple of nights in jail before appearing before trial judge, Raymond Dearie, who will handle the preliminary arraignment and raise the possibility of bail.

Because of the seriousness of the case and Li’s participation in these illegal goings on at the FIFA, he was declared as second defendant in the criminal action filed this week by the attorney general of the United States, Loretta Lynch.

Among the charges against him include conspiracy, wire fraud, and money laundering, both at the  Uncaf and Concacaf, facing a maximum sentence of 20 years in prison.

The Vatican Enquirer tried to contact the Cost Rican consulate in New York and Embassy in Washington to know more about the preparation plans for Li’s arrival and any assistance they will be providing the Costa Rican, but our calls went unanswered.

The MDC was in the eye of the hurricane a few years ago, after being criticized for the alleged torture of prisoners, prisoners not allowed to call their families or have access to their lawyers for long periods of time. And allegations of keeping prisoners in their cells up to 23 hours a day to keep staffing costs down.

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Costa Rica Gets A ‘Do Over’ Because It Was Snowing http://vaticanenquirer.com/costa-rica-gets-a-do-over-because-it-was-snowing/ http://vaticanenquirer.com/costa-rica-gets-a-do-over-because-it-was-snowing/#respond Mon, 25 Mar 2013 15:59:57 +0000 http://vaticanenquirer.com/?p=112 Costa Rica v United States - FIFA 2014 World Cup Qualifier

Costa Rica’s national soccer team will get a do over (do something over again, to repeat something) Friday night’s game with the United States.

“It was snowing really hard”, said Costa Rican manager Jorge Luis Pinto about the field conditions at the Commerce City, Colorado stadium, where his team lost to the gringos in World Cup qualifying 1-0.

The Ticos complained to the FIFA and the world soccer organization agreed it was unfair and the game will be replayed. The FIFA did not say when the make up game will be played. A FIFA official, who remained nameless, was quoted as saying it (the make up game) may not be necessary, as the Ticos “don’t stand a freezing chance of qualifying and one loss won’t make much of a difference in the overall of things”.

There is no argument that the game was an “embarrassment” for the Costa Rican team. Some would even call it an insult to Costa Rica.

The US, however, sees it different. “Yes, they did ask for the game to be postponed, but they finished the game. And they lost. Here’s the thing, would the Ticos be complaining if they had won? When we play down there, it is really in the island an we don’t complain”, was the unofficial statement by the US team.

One of the complaints by the Tico players was “we couldn’t see the ball, even though they used the yellow ones”.

In their argument to the FIFA, the Ticos said, “if we had played without snow, we would have won”.

Play they did. Lost they did. Complained they did. Play again they will.

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