<\/a>VATICAN ENQUIRER, San Jose, Costa Rica \u2013 Luis Guillermo Sol\u00eds will be sporting a sleek new wig to disguise his bald head and avoid being characterized at the United Nations as \u201cel pelon,\u201d the President announced Monday.<\/p>\n

Sol\u00eds, held his press conference at downtown fresa-hipster bar Steinforth, to a backdrop of electronic music, a smoke machine and a psychedelic light show. He emerged from the smoke wearing skinny jeans, a v-neck shirt that said \u201cGot President?\u201d, and a head full of fake, cool-looking young person hair.<\/p>\n

\u201cQu\u00e9 me dicen maeeess?\u201d He yelled as he took the stage and spread his arms wide. \u201cNotice anything new?\u201d He asked. He then paused and said \u201cYa soy el Presidente, caripichhhhas!!\u201d<\/p>\n

Sol\u00eds, who relied on young voters to propel his meteoric rise to the presidency, promising supporters he was going to be \u201cEl Presidente M\u00e1s Chiva\u201d in the history of the country, decided it was time to live up to the promise. He also said that, with his new hair, he will now be the coolest-looking Latin American President.<\/p>\n

\u201cThis is definitely a cooler look than Pe\u00f1a Nieto\u2019s greasy mobster hair,\u201d he said. \u201cThe only regional President with more hair now is Evo Morales, and I think he is actually just an Andean sheepdog.\u201d<\/p>\n

The hair will better represent Costa Rica as an exciting young nation full of vitality and attractive people, he said. Presidents that have a full-head of hair attract an average of 30% more foreign direct investment during their administration, Sol\u00eds said, citing a study conducted by the University of Chepe Centro.<\/p>\n

Adapted from Elpeji.com<\/a> report of April 2014.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

VATICAN ENQUIRER, San Jose, Costa Rica \u2013 Luis Guillermo Sol\u00eds will be sporting a sleek new wig to disguise his bald head and avoid being characterized at the United Nations as \u201cel pelon,\u201d the President announced Monday. Sol\u00eds, held his press conference at downtown fresa-hipster bar Steinforth, to a backdrop of electronic music, a smoke […] More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":1614,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false},"categories":[102],"tags":[203],"adace-sponsor":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/08\/solis-hair.jpg","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"wps_subtitle":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1613"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1613"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1613\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1616,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1613\/revisions\/1616"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1614"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1613"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1613"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1613"},{"taxonomy":"adace-sponsor","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/adace-sponsor?post=1613"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}