COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report<\/a>)\u2014After rebuffing Donald J. Trump\u2019s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead.<\/p>\n

<\/a><\/p>\n

\u201cAs we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,\u201d a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. \u201cWe have noted, however, that during the Trump regime pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDenmark would be interested in purchasing the United States in its entirety, with the exception of its government,\u201d the spokesperson added.<\/p>\n

A key provision of the purchase offer, the spokesperson said, would be the relocation of Donald Trump to another country \u201cto be determined,\u201d with Russia and North Korea cited as possible destinations.<\/p>\n

If Denmark\u2019s bid for the United States is accepted, the Scandinavian nation has ambitious plans for its new acquisition. \u201cWe believe that, by giving the U.S. an educational system and national health care, it could be transformed from a vast land mass into a great nation,\u201d the spokesperson said.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report)\u2014After rebuffing Donald J. Trump\u2019s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead. \u201cAs we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,\u201d a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. \u201cWe have noted, however, that during the […] More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":2725,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"spay_email":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false},"categories":[259,1],"tags":[405,407,406,217],"adace-sponsor":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/Borowitz-Denmark.jpg","jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"wps_subtitle":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2724"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2724"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2724\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2727,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2724\/revisions\/2727"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2725"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2724"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2724"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2724"},{"taxonomy":"adace-sponsor","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/vaticanenquirer.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/adace-sponsor?post=2724"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}