A satirical commentary on the news.
The mystery of Melania’s absence, of not been seen in public in weeks is solved: Melania has left the Donald and has moved into a trailer in NW Georgia with Marla. They are writing a tell-all book called “Our Donald”. CNN’s Anderson Cooper has supposedly (according to Russian internet bots) worked it out so that […] More
Roberto Rodriguez is a worried man. Never in the past decade has he driven his car without abusing fellow drivers or getting into a scuffle with motorcyclists or pedestrians. All this because of the traffic condition in his city. Rodriguez has written to Elon Musk, the owner of Tesla, asking if the driverless car will […] More
America — For years, Latinos have insisted that they are also “Americans.” Now, US President Donald Trump plans to fine them each time they use the term. Latin-Americans have well-known fury from being excluded from the “American” membership. Each time a US citizen identifies as American, the resulting argument is more intense than deciding which […] More
“Shit, shit, fucking shit, stupid asshole, it’s all wrong,” scientist Stephen Hawking said this morning when he discovered himself walking and with the vitality of his youth and to see that there is life after death and that, for therefore, all his assumptions about the nature of the universe were incorrect. “Oh, fuck, really?” Exclaimed […] More
Mario is done being a plumber. Princess Peach is going to have to find a new plumber to call the next time her toilet gets clogged. According to Nintento, the world’s famour plumber is now an “All around sporty”. Whether it’s tennis or baseball, soccer or car racing, Mario does everything cool. What we don’t […] More
(VATICAN ENQUIRER) Low profits is the reason for McDonald’s announcement of the removal of all Canadian franchises. After a year of struggling to maintain profits in 2015, the McDonald’s franchise has seen an even worse decline in 2016: starting in the US after multiple tax policies have increased the cost of doing business for the […] More
(VATICAN ENQUIRER) Los Angeles | Yoko Ono shocked reporters yesterday when she responded to a question concerning the presidential run of Hillary Clinton and the possibility that she could become the first woman President of the United States in American history. The artist and widow of John Lennon, who is in Los Angeles to present […] More
THE VATICAN ENQUIRER – Canada’s prime minister, Justin Trudeau, also dubbed as “Canada’s Obama”, announced he is converting from Christianity to Islam. In a 13 minute press conference Friday, Trudeau explained his decision in his life: “After meeting thousands of new Syrian refugees, listening to their stories and learning more about the Muslim faith, I […] More
A college softball player from the University of Texas shocked the sports world today by coming out as a heterosexual. In an emotional press conference this morning, Jennifer Ryan, 23, announced that she was a “proud member” of the opposite-sex community. The senior shortstop is believed to be the first and only openly straight women’s […] More
VATICAN ENQUIRER – Yoga pants have been a controversial topic across America, the issue first surfacing in Massachusetts, Oklahoma and Californa, as the snugnitude encasing the lower half of women’s bodies struck fear in the hears of Americans. How the debate is over, the Federal government has issued a ban on the sale and wear […] More
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Mons L. Pisanello
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